Above: My daughter on her birthday, after we Ubered to a salon because I was nowhere close to driving after being hit by that car in the crosswalk. She calls me a Boomer, because sometimes I really do seem that out of touch.
Earlier this month, I read a piece on Medium about Geriatric Millennials—that group of us born between ‘79 and the mid ‘80s who also identify as Xennials. We’re that generation that grew up with a vague concept of the internet and were then expected to master it. We stepped out on our own at the same moment the twin towers fell. And most of us clearly understand that the world within which our parents raised us to succeed no longer exists. But, no worries: Our closets are full of participation trophies to boost morale!
Reading through the comments on Nate Miller’s insightful piece, the one that struck me most was about our use of the word “geriatric.” I mean, we’re actually in our late 30s and early 40s—more “middle-aged” than “elderly.” And yet, we actually do face increasingly higher rates of serious diseases—like cancer, heart attack, and stroke—that typically affect older populations.
The presence of COVID gives us one more way to die, having become the third most likely way for someone in their 40s to go. Additionally, long COVID has left many of us 30 and 40 somethings legitimately feeling far older than we are.
At 38, with metastatic cancer and a pelvic injury, I fall into the first group. Fortunately, I’ve recently moved from my walker to a cool midnight, blue cane, and the sight of my kids hobbling around with it and pinching each others’ cheeks brings me a lot of joy. My cancer is also responding excellently to my blend of oral chemotherapy and medically induced menopause. One-third of it is just gone with the rest following suite, but I'm also rapidly aging at the cellular level.
For me, 60 seems ancient, and living to be 50 is a miracle that I hope to celebrate. This doesn't depress me. However, it does shift my attitude toward life, and I've realized that I'd rather experience the whole of life (including being geriatric) in a concentrated period of years than to live in an extended state of perpetual youth. I'm neuro-divergent and understand that my thinking is odd but nonetheless valid.
All that said, I’ve recently started to think more about what The Grey Way, as a concept, means to me. It’s the experience of aging while still feeling young, and it’s a practice of living in harmony with scars, and tears, and laughter. As the newsletter itself is concerned, I’ve updated the About page.
Thanks, as always, for following along the grey way with me. Donations to any and all of my campaigns are still needed and welcome—even though consistent work with GA Center for Nonprofits and Education Without Limits has helped bring some stability into my life after getting struck by a car further shook it up and forced me to release some of the clients I’d worked hard to acquire. A collection of links for contributing to my projects and connecting on social media is here: Kelli Lynn Grey's Flowpage (flowcode.com). (Just sayin’, my son’s 11th birthday is also tomorrow, and any extra contributions for that little guy would be super special!)
Meanwhile, here are some highlights of where the grey way has led me (and what it’s taught me) in the past month or so.
Along with two other moving pieces about death and birth, my poem about being hit by a car was featured in Found in My Journal’s July newsletter.
July Writing Prompt Editor’s Picks | by Found In My Journal | Aug, 2021 | Found In My Journal
As other Medium writers’ go, I’ve been branching out on who I read. I look forward to sharing their work. However, for now, I bring you an essay that highlights the work of Shannon Ashley, another Medium writer in need.
Working for GA Center for Nonprofits (and our sister site Work For Good), I’ve created:
Funding and Resource Opportunities | August 2021 | The Georgia Center for Nonprofits (gcn.org)
Georgia Nonprofit NEWS | July 2021 | The Georgia Center for Nonprofits (gcn.org)
Find your workplace fit by interviewing with values in mind | Work for Good
Resume trends: Could you use an assist from TikTok or Elle Woods? | Work for Good
Working for Education Without Limits, I’ve helped build innovative curriculum tools and explored:
John Lewis' Legacy of Good Trouble (ewlhub.org)
4 Best Practices for Confidently Teaching Controversial Ideas (ewlhub.org)
From here forward, a growing compilation of steps I’m taking to help eradicate systemic racism and widespread ableism is here:
And, my dope insights into conscious cannabis culture are here:
Finally, here’s the latest on my ongoing (but genuinely almost complete) project Queen of Wands:
May all you love thrive, even as we find ourselves at the end of the world,
Kelli Lynn Grey